I’d like to say some wise and meaningful crap, but the fact I just referred to it as “crap” shows just how meaningful I can be. (You’d be more impressed with me if you never met anyone else)
But here goes:
I’m thinking the easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What’s the worst thing that could happen? If everything went wrong, maybe you’d get a pulse. Ain’t nothing wrong with that!
(I know right now Doug that you are thinking of Ken right now huh?)
I’m thinking I might want to buy a junkyard just to grow my own junk food.
All I want in this world is some one I can turn to and yell, “Avenge Me!!” if I’m dying or wrongly accused of a crime. Or any injustice for that matter. Oh and rocket shoes. Pretty pink rocket shoes.
Looking at photos and seeing how much I’ve aged....well....it has inspired me to make a resolution for 2011: NO MORE PHOTOS. Actually I’ve set more realistic New Year’s resolutions this year, like never doing anything right and not pleasing anybody. All of my resolutions for 2011 is that I will attempt to –and hopefully succeed– (but who is to really say what “success” is?) in being –in no uncertain terms– more succinct. How am I doing so far?
I’m sorry, DISH TV, I couldn’t care less if I can pause my DVR in one room and resume it in another. Want to impress me? Free movie channels forever. Or send me a miniature giraffe. Either one will do fine, but I would actually prefer the miniature giraffe. At least it can reach the DISH when it piles up with snow and I lose all reception!
Do I have a dream? Of course I do.....I dream of a better tomorrow… where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives!
For those of you who have young children, if you have plans to teach your children the value of dollar, you better hurry up.
Let's not forget the Weather Forcaster, who can screw up on the job every single day and be paid so well. Now that too is an easy job, and you don't have to play with dead bodies.
ReplyDeleteFinally New Years resolutions that I can actually keep. Thanks for the wonderful suggestions, hope you don't mind if I borrow them. Another one might be to offend as many rude people as possible, I really enjoy doing that.
Darnit Vickie, I am a follower but do not know which profile to select. Am begining to wonder if I might be blonde afterall. Valrie
ReplyDeleteWHERE ARE YOU????? Valrie
ReplyDeleteWow....YOU finally managed to get yourself as a 'follower'...how the hell did you figure it out Missouri?????
ReplyDeleteBeats me but I still do not know which profile to choose. None of them seem to work for me so I remain anomymous. Guess I really am hopeless. Still love your posts even if I don't know who I am.
ReplyDeleteVickie, I have come to the conclusion that you need to author a book. It would be a fun read that no one could put down. Now get busy!
ReplyDelete