Just my Confessions:
Don’t confuse my personality with my attitude. My personality is who I am. My attitude depends on who you are.
I will never outgrow Darigold chocolate milk. It's so hard to come by here in California. Come on Darigold, open up a plant here will ya?
I don’t have a bucket list, but my fucket list is a mile long.
As a woman - taking your bra off at the end of a long day is quite possibly one of best feelings ever.
I will respect any religion you practice as long as you never knock on my door to tell me about it.
My Complaints:
Sometimes life can be so depressing - I sincerely thought we’d have some futuristic Jetsons shit by now.
Republicans are red, Democrats are blue. Our government did shut down cause neither one gives a damn about you.
If you’re gonna flip out on your Facebook, don’t delete it all the next day. Some people, I am sure still want to share your meltdown with their friends. “Please, tell me more about the drama in your life via Facebook.” said Nobody - ever.
Miley Cyrus was on the Disney Channel and had her clothes on when Bush was President. Thanks, Obama.
My Solutions:
Life should be more like Hockey. If somebody pisses you off, you beat the shit out of them, then sit in a penalty box for 5 minutes, then go about your business as usual.
Having trouble sleeping? Only kids count sheep to fall asleep. Count your debts, your mistakes, your heartaches and then cry yourself to sleep like a grownup!!!
If I could trade places with anyone for a day it would have to be on the day I die because I wouldn’t want to be me when that happens. I know I've said this before but I'm going to say it again - I really hope that my last words in this world are: “I wonder what this does…”
You do not have to attend every argument you are invited to.
My Questions:
If those Amazon drones can really get to your house in 30 minutes then don't you think condoms are about to become their #1 selling item? But wait - won't it be a really awkward moment when your Amazon delivery drone just hovers there, waiting for a tip?
Does anyone else feel that you could substitute Miranda rights for wedding vows? Verbatim.
I can’t believe it’s been almost a year since the world ended in 2012. I don't see any changes, do you? Seriously, it's like the world never ended.
That's it, a shorter than short blog. Prepare yourself for the next one (especially YOU-Finnish cousin in Florida) it's gonna be a long one. Specifically about growing up in a small town. Run now. Run, I tell ya!
For now I decided that I no longer want to be an adult…if you need me, I’ll be in my tree fort.
