Just another February

Well, here we are again - The Super Bowl. New England Patriots vs Atlanta Falcons. I don't enjoy football at all, I don't follow it, I simply don't have any interest in it. I will say if I had to choose one of these teams I would choose the Falcons. I can just see the Patriots fans reactions if their team doesn't win -  New England Patriots fans be like "I refuse to accept the results of this Super Bowl game. On the following day we'll be protesting, picketing, looting, rioting, and forming support groups. #NotMySuperBowl " I mean seriously who can forget QB Tom Brady and the allegation that the New England Patriots deliberately underinflated footballs in the game against the Indianapolis Colts in 2015? Wasn't Brady suspended? Inflategate. Still laughing about that. I suppose it's all about perspective. The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the lobsters and crab in the ship's kitchen. I suppose deflated footballs are a miracle to Tom Brady. I probably should apologize to any Patriots fans out there. But then, it's me. I don't like thinking before I say something. I like to be just as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth. I just can't help it ... Sarcastic bitch is built-in. 

My predictions for the future:

2016: Trump was elected President

2018: Border wall completed 

2020: Mexico takes Gold, Silver & Bronze in Pole Vault at the Summer Olympics.

I won't do my normal political bitching so relax........but......I 'm just say'n:

I find it really funny how liberals refer to Trump as an orange s*it-gibbon. If the rest of us referred to Obama using a color and a simeon metaphor, we'd be hung out to dry. Seriously. 

Alls I'm say'n is the Chinese built a wall 2,000 years ago - and they still don't have any illegal Mexicans bringing in crime and drugs! I think when Trump says Mexico will pay for that wall he doesn't mean the Government but El Chapo's seized 14 billion assets from criminal forfeiture, right? 

And this is from a California poll: 

Do you think that illegal immigration is a real problem?    A. Yes------- 20%     B.  No-------- 10%       C. No comprende---70%

Memories from the past: 

My brother took going to jail really awful. He refused food, drinks. He spat and swore at anyone who came near him and started throwing things everywhere. After that we NEVER EVER played monopoly again.

I always wonder how I can remember lyrics to a song I haven't heard since 1980. But can't, even for a million bucks; remember why I'm just standing in the middle of the kitchen.

Just for fun....because I have a crazy side of me:

I enjoy planting sex toys at yard sales in my town, then I just sit back to watch the magic unfold.

If I ever put stuff in storage I'm going to write "gold bars", "priceless memorabilia" and "seized drugs" on the boxes just to mess with storage wars.

Thinking of you Bridget:  I just want you to know. I removed my windshield wipers and now I don't get parking tickets. 

Just the truth: 

The nice thing about being single is when you're setting the silverware, it doesn't matter which side you put the remote on. 

The brownies my daughter and I  started making in her Easy Bake Oven in 1977 are just about ready if you guys want one. Let me know.

I sent off for some information on my other family tree, you know - on my Mother's Welsh/Irish side. They sent me back a packet of seeds and suggested it would be in my best interest that I just start over. Totally agree.

It's guaranteed to happen. Sitting in the movie theatre, ready to watch the movie, then BOOM! The human giraffe sits in front of you.

I force my dogs to watch animal abuse commercials just to show them how good they have it. I can't watch those ghastly commercials, but I make them watch. 

For my New Year’s Resolution, I had decided to only smoke after sex. If 2016 is anything to go by, I’ve quit. Which brings to mind - I'll never fly Virgin Airlines. Why would anyone want to fly an airline that doesn't go all the way?

Sometimes you run into people who just make your day more bearable. Those people are called bartenders.

The truth is, I find it very stressful that Smokey the Bear thinks that I'm the only one that can prevent forest fires. I don't feel trained for this, and I certainly didn't sign up for the position.

I'm starting to think that life isn't worth living anymore and... Oh wait, there's the bartender now. Nevermind.

I tried to log in on my iPad. Turns out it was my granddaughter Skylar's Etch-a-Sketch and I don't own an iPad.  Also, I'm out of vodka.

When my daughter  visits - We should just drop off my truck at the Sheriff's Department before going out at night so we can drive home in the morning. (If it weren’t for law enforcement and physics, we would be unstoppable....oh that in itself is scary!)

The election is over, can't the liberals get over it? I haven’t seen the Democrats so angry since the Republicans took away their slaves.

Just and idea of mine: 

Political candidates should be made to wear NASCAR suits so we can tell who their sponsors are.

Life Lessons: 

No matter what life brings you, always take a lesson from your dogs.. Kick some grass over that s**t and move on.

It’s always a good time to clean the refrigerator when something closes the door from the inside.

The path to inner peace begins with 3 simple words....Not my problem. Ya Know?!?......The number of ways I could care less...... is astounding!

As always I have questions: 

Why, why, WHY  are we still testing on animals when there are pedophiles in prison?

You know what I find questionable? Paintings of Adam and Eve with belly buttons. Think about it.

Is there any way to really know how many camouflage shirts are in your house? And does anyone else find it ironic that "camo" print actually makes rednecks stand out in society?

I know, I've said this before, but come on - on Thanksgiving shouldn’t the Patriots play the Redskins, and then steal their stadium? 

Ideas for my grandson Jeffrey's career choice:

Military EOD (Explosive Ordnance Disposal) technician. The downside of being a bomb disposal technician? It takes 6 hours to open Christmas gifts. He would be perfect. This Christmas he took forever. I mean FOREVER. He definitely has the patience!

This is ridiculous!

As it stands now California has a LOT of sanctuary cities and counties. Now the Democratic California legislators wants to make the entire State of California a sanctuary state for all illegal immigrants. Know what that means to us law abiding legal citizens? The U.S. Government will withhold all federal monies from this state when it fails to uphold or comply with federal immigration laws. That's 330 billion California will not receive in grants from the Government. Billions of dollars in federal funding will be withheld.  Think about just how that is going to affect us NON ILLEGALS! Pay attention to Senate Bill 54, written by Democrat Senate President Pro Tem Kevin de Leon of Los Angeles. That bill will also consider providing taxpayer dollars to fund lawyers for illegal immigrants facing deportation. You want me to pay higher taxes to defend illegal immigrants? HELL NO. 

Oh now I'm all depressed - so off I go

I'll never ever forget 2016

Yes, 2016:

The year I climbed Mt. Shasta barefoot in the snow, opened a Finnish crusine food truck selling only Finlandia vodka, got my fishing license because I love to eat fish, parachuted out of a crop plane in Chico, threw out the opening pitch at a S.F.Giants game, filed a patent for wizard doors, rode a camel across Afghanistan, hacked the D.N.C., became fluent in Finnish, Russian and Chinese, tampered with the smoke detector on a Alaska Airlines flight by smoking in the restroom, bled blue and white blood, created a housing development for the gnomes living next door, declared the Clinton's eradicated in America, met a Finn I wasn’t related to, inherited a controlling stake in Amazon delivery drones, negotiated an alternative to Obamacare and signed up twelve million uninsured immigrants, minted a new coin with my dog Shep's likeness on it, sold my majority stake in Amazon drones, released the No. 1 Billboard hit single “I Hate Hillary,” defused 31 Soviet-era landmines, got my first pet black bear, pitched a perfect game for the Seattle Mariners, repealed the Fourth Amendment for non-natural born citizens, went back to night school just to give my 5 dogs some peace and quiet, sold my family vodka recipe to Natural Liquor's, filed for a recount in California, visited the Statue of Liberty in New York (and incidentally a black guy asked me if the Yankees won to which I replied, "Yeah, man, you're free.") and crippled the nasdaq by cashing in all my loose bar change.

Here’s to 2017 -  

And to the end of the Obama Administration - the President who did nothing but leave America to wallow in racial division.

What I learned in the year 2016:

Mental toughness, happiness and living life to the fullest come from knowing what to care about–and most importantly, what not to care about.

You don't see faith healers working in hospitals, just like you don't see psychics winning the lottery every week.

Apparently, driving past our local sheriff cars while drinking water from an old vodka bottle isn't 'funny' and is technically 'wasting' their time. Who knew?

Apparently RSVP'ing back to a wedding invite 'maybe next time' isn't the correct response.

I prefer to think outside the box because things can get very dark inside it.

Of all the martial arts, Karaoke inflicts the most pain.

Life Gets (a Lot) Better When You Stop Giving a F*ck.

The only thing holding you back from doing something truly amazing, is you. If you want to do something amazing, don’t just talk about it, just go do it.

As usual I have questions:

Why do I get the feeling that a lot of you are using Facebook as a substitution for prescription meds?

OK. I just want to know who decided to call it "possession of marijuana" and not "joint custody"?

Don't ya wish you could hold people up to the light like a $20 bill to tell if they're fake or real?

Aren't we all glad that we as humans settled on the hand shake as a greeting instead of the whole ass sniffing thing?

Is it really all that wrong to drop off drunks at houses that aren't theirs?

Reflecting back......

My mom put shredded carrots in my Jello, so don't ever  tell me about your rough childhood.

I grew up in a town where the population never changed. Every time a girl got pregnant, a guy left town.

In the 1960s, if you said "All my music is in the cloud" it was due to mushrooms; not Apple or Google.

The things parents tell their children! The little piggy who went to market... wasn't going shopping.! Wrap your mind around that for a moment.

I was married at 18. My ex husband and I had been happily married for two years. 1973 & 1978. Which brings to mind - from what I can gather, men hit their sexual peak around age 18.  Women hit theirs as soon as the divorce is final. Umm, 18 is TOO young to get married! You can't even buy booze at 18! If you can't buy booze, how the hell are you gonna make a marriage work?!? 

Congratulations to Finland! 

An entire year of festivities will be happening in Finland to celebrate 100 years of independence from Russia. There will be hundreds of events throughout the year, ending on Dec. 6, the day Finnish Parliament declared independence in 1917. Yay! I will celebrate with you in heart and spirit!

Just my true feelings because I have no filter:

I am so glad Megyn Kelly will be gone from FOX news  before the Trump administration begins. She was too anti-trump for me. Here's hoping either Kimberly Guilfoyle or Judge Jeanine Pirro takes her spot!

Got a problem with me? Solve it. Think I’m trippin? Tie my shoes. Can’t stand me? Sit back down. Can’t face me? Turn around.

An excellent suggestion for Hillary's future, one that would allow President Elect Trump to show his true bi-partisan feelings! Make Hillary Clinton Ambassador to Libya and station her at Benghazi. If things don't work out well, at that point what difference would it make?

There are only two types of honest people in this world, small children and drunk people.

I love animals. Especially the sweet and sour pork at Peter Chu's.

I am dedicated to being opinionated. It works for me so my advice to everyone is: Be a rebel, speak what is on your mind.

Just my usual complaining:

Me shopping at walmart: Look, if your cart is in the middle of the aisle and I need to get by, then yes, this is bumper cars.

Neighborhood potluck Xmas parties with neighbors you don't even know: Sorry I was a no show for the 5th time in a row, I thought you would stop inviting me by now. I'm not a social person. I am very selective in who I hang with and I seriously don't like groups of people I don't know. Sorry, but thanks for the invite nonetheless. 

My local bar: A place where people, who know so little about anything, have so much to say about everything.

Finland celebrates "Day of Sisu" 

Every year on February 28th. Apparently this is a relatively new thing from what I understand. Actually I celebrate it every day of my life. What the Finn's call Sisu, all their neighboring countries call stubbornness! My neighbor Marcia can attest to me as being very stubborn, right Marcia? Hell yeah, and damn proud of my stubbornness. It's my mode of survival. If I was younger I could clear a forest bare handed. If I was younger......If I was younger.......If ONLY I was younger. Damnit now I'm depressed. 

Which brings to mind, and I'm not really sure why but It's such a cold winter this year that the squirrels are collecting more nuts than usual. So far 3 of my neighbors have disappeared. No worries for me though because Marcia and Lee are still safe and sound. 

Stop poking the Russian Bear Obama!

We (as a country) have turned our cheek for 8 long years and let enemies from within bring us to the breaking point, thanks to Obama.  We have let this man and this administration take our country into such dark places of depravity that I don't recognize it anymore. Why does our president praise and pay off Iran, ignore China’s man-made island building and region threatening, but provoke Russia? Russia has the second most powerful military in the world. It has the world’s largest nuclear arsenal. I don’t think Russia is our friend, but when it comes to mortal enemies…..America’s all full up. WTH is Obama doing? Quit pissing off the Russian Bear!  His decision to force dozens of Russian diplomats out of the USA and impose new sanctions on Moscow for "allegedly" interfering in the 2016 election was a childish act. Show me and the rest of us Americans that Russia interfered. Where's the proof? Guessing or assuming where and who the hackers were is just plain crazy. This, to me, is insufficient to take any action against anyone or any country.

Compliments of my Finnish cousin Allen.
Perfect cuz, just perfect!

At least Putin did not reciprocate with any similar actions aimed at the American diplomats in Russia. He could have. And he could have done much worse. He didn't.  Good thing at least one president did the presidential thing. Thank you President Putin for not escalating this situation.
Here's the truth of the matter:
Putin: "Actually, we're not going to retaliate in response to the new sanctions".
Putin went on to state: "As it proceeds from international practice, Russia has reasons to respond in kind. Although we have the right to retaliate, we will not resort to irresponsible ‘kitchen’ diplomacy but will plan our further steps to restore Russian-US relations based on the policies of the Trump Administration."  (In other words, 'screw you, Obama, we'll wait for calmer heads to prevail')
Putin also said: "The diplomats who are returning to Russia will spend the New Year’s holidays with their families and friends. We will not create any problems for US diplomats. We will not expel anyone. We will not prevent their families and children from using their traditional leisure sites during the New Year’s holidays. Moreover, I invite all children of US diplomats accredited in Russia to the New Year and Christmas children’s parties in the Kremlin."

Now anyone who knows me knows I hate Putin and I have a very high disregard for the Russian State as a whole.....but, and I mean BUT.......How's that for a class act? When one country (USA) is expelling diplomats, it doesn't look so good when the other (Russia) is effectively shrugging and inviting a bunch of kids to a party in response. Putin's response makes Obama look childish, which I'm assuming is the opposite of what he wanted.

To add insult to injury, Russian Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev tweeted 'RIP' to the Obama administration. The actual tweet looked like this:

????????, ??? ????????????? ?????, ??????? ???????? ???? ????? ? ?????????????? ??????????????, ??????????? ?? ?????????????? ???????. RIP

— ??????? ???????? (@MedvedevRussia) December 30, 2016

(Obviously I don't know how to read Russian, but I assume it was not something to be taken lightly)

What is with the governments of countries nowadays? Tweeting? This social media crap is out of hand! Has nobody learned the lessons of tweeting, facebooking or emailing? 

So, my feelings on all of this, and I know nobody asked but - I grew up during the Cold War. We feared Russia with the mutual destruction from nuclear bombs. I prefer it much more the way things are now, trying to get along in a somewhat mutual "whatever" co-existence.  I'm just going to plow through the chaos, and focus on surviving what comes next. Vladimir Putin is a threat to the world as we know it, we all know that. Back in Reagan's time  Reagan offered his hand to Gorbachev and that worked. Trump has nothing to lose by extending his to Putin. Good relations does not mean we have to back down. Trump and Putin can avert Cold War II because I'd like to believe that they are men who care about their people and want what's best for their countries! Now, if Obama will just stay the hell out of it! I personally would like to see a coalition with the Russians to deal with and destroy the threat ISIS presents to the rest of the world! ISIS wouldn't stand a chance with these 2 countries working together. President Trump (soon to be) would be wise to explore possible alliance with Russia in areas of common interest before seeking yet another enemy of the United States. Besides, our  real enemy is North Korea and/or Iran.  At one time Great Britain was our bitterest enemy, now they are our closest ally. Things can and do change. We managed to work out a peace,however tense, with Stalin, so I imagine we can do it with Putin.  

(Thanks again  cuz Allen )

My thoughts on the Russians hacking the election? I call BullSh*t! This so called hacking didn't involve actually manipulating any voting systems. All it did was air the dirty laundry of the Clinton campaign and the Democrat Party. Hillary and Podesta had their dirty laundry put on display by wikileaks and now nobody is talking about what they all did or said. Freaking Unbelievable. Whoever hacked this crap did nothing but expose the truth. My bets are on an inside job. Even though I hate Putin for my own personal reasons I hope Trump invites Putin to his inauguration. Now that would be something. I think we have very good reason to smooth our relations with Putin and visa versa. Our traditional allies in western Europe are gradually morphing into a Caliphate and when it finally happens both we and Putin/Russia will need each other.

Unbelievable Americans!

A REAL photo!

Christmas in the Finnish Forest 2016:

For the last couple of years there is nothing very traditional about Christmas around my place. Yes, I am the grandmother who makes her grandchildren get on ATV's and drive around the property, in the snow, in the freezing weather, looking for Christmas presents. For some reason good old Santa bypasses my place  (maybe because the woodstove is always burning, who knows, maybe because I got 5 dogs that might chase reindeer and a very fat man?). He just drops them in the trees while passing by. Personally myself I think he's just gotten lazy. Nonetheless the kids love it and even though they obviously don't believe in the fat man they oblige my daughter and I by going out and looking. (do as (someone) asks or desires in order to help or please them.......ha ha ha!) I'm pretty sure these grandkids love this crazy ass Finn Grandmother - they never know what to expect, right?

Yes, I'm showing myself out now, thanks.

I know, I know, you're tired of listening to me. 

 Happy New Year to everyone.